A friend of mine lent me her copy of Susan Page’s, “If I’m So Wonderful, Why Am I Still Single?” At first blush, I dismissed the book as one of those feel good books that leave you with little meat. Sort of like chocolate cake. Sure, it tastes great but it’s nothing but empty calories. Instead what I’m finding is a well thought out and surprising set of exercises that require an amount in introspection and reflection.

In the first chapter she has you list all the reasons why you are single. Then she says those are all just excuses and the following chapter delves deeper asking do you really want to be in a relationship? Are you seriously committed to being in one or do you just want one but your real love and passion lie elsewhere? These are serious and soul searching questions that require time and thought to answer. Layers of self-deception peeled back to reveal harsh truths.

Past the first 5 exercises that deal with finding out if you really want a relationship, the book jumps into a 5 step  strategy on how to find and meet people. Though some of the examples are dated and are little more than walking around talking to random people some are actually good. One suggestion was walking around grocery stores talking to people. In today’s plugged and tuned out crowd talk to anyone and you’ll get a, sigh, ripped out earbud, glassy stare and an irritated, “What?”

Spends several chapters talking about not compromising when finding love and how and why you should have high standards. What I really like about this book is the lack of what I call “fortune cookie” advice. Pithy sayings without any detail on exactly what that means or how to achieve it.

I am a details sort of person and if someone tells me something and the how of it is not readily evident I’m not a happy camper. Each piece of advice in the book is followed by detailed examples and ways to achieve the goal. All in all, a decent read with some easy to follow advice.  

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